There is a story that roams my family archives
my first response to being asked
what I want to ‘be’ when I grow up.
I would like to honour the wisdom
of that 3 year old
who I believe knew her life purpose
in aspiring to embody the Divine Mother.
Standing in the position of budding elder
I look at the altar of my life,
through all the ceremonies I’ve lived
and I come home to this
long held wisdom,
precious teachings of our first peoples
bestowing highest honour
on the Grandmother of us all,
this divine feminine aspect of the Universe
this hub of our existence
our relationship to the sacred
our capacity to self-love.
If I am to grow up finally
to claim my Universal self knowing,
I believe it to be high time
to declare a truce
with my masculinity,
that which exhausts itself trying to prove
its worthiness again and again over lifetimes.
I am ready to make pilgrimage to the very heart
of my sacred feminine.
In deep reverence
for her eternal beauty,
I will bow before her wisdom
her great intuition
preparing the temple of my physical, emotional,
aligning my spirit
to honour the fullness of her presence.
I will surrender the core of my identity,
all the roles I’ve ever assumed
over these many lives,
to open my heart centre.
All that I have held against myself
I will release into the waters of rebirth,
the purification of self-forgiveness.
When I emerge from that ceremony,
I will be one with the most tender
and the most fierce,
this Mother self
who knows her own self-care
is indispensable to the whole,
one with this sister self
who knows Gaia’s self-care
is impossible to separate
from my own,
one with this spider nature
that can sit at the hub
of a web of relations
knowing my beloveds will come
to visit my heartfield
anchoring the rich self-wisdom
they already have,
remembering the Love their souls are made of.
When I am one with this sacred feminine,
I will occupy the centre of my temple
and all who approach me
with respect, and honour
this sanctuary of my heart
will know peace with their own
deep feminine nature.
When I grow into my full potential
as a Universal self
perhaps I will call myself
a planetary love activist then
joining my sisters and brothers
as we rediscover together
the ancient lovemaking
our kitchens can hallow,
remembering the ancient ways,
how we grow food, gather, harvest
and prepare it with gratitude for all our relations,
how we touch food,
touch one another and all of life with
reverence for the sacred,
laying offerings before
our divine mother selves
and the altars of our hearts.
[For all my mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters, wives and daughters, my fathers, grandfathers, uncles, brothers, husbands and sons … all my soul friends. May we come home to our true nature and embody this wisdom!]